The Virus
King Jettson has declared a state of emergency in all the Shockley land. There is a virus going around that the village idiot has dubbed the “Chinese Virus”. Our 1/3 acre kingdom has come to a screeching halt. All of the grandparents - the king prefers to call them his loyal subjects - have been expelled to the far away lands of Panama and Boiling Springs. All who remain have been shackled at the waste and ankles and are being forced to run the production line at the milk factory. That would be myself and my wife.
Its been two days and I have already been called into to the HR department at the factory - ironically enough this is also run by the king - to deal with a complaint filed by one of my co workers. Apparently I have been staring too much during the milking process, something I will admit happens from time to time. The King has made it clear that “Those are his to stare at now” and that I will be banished to the diaper pit if my actions continue. I reluctantly tucked my tail and apologized for my behavior.
I’m not sure how to approach my co worker to deal with her concerns. Food usually makes everything better so tonight I plan on scrounging up some of our ration reserves to put together a nice meal for her. The King will get left overs in a day or so, it is important that he understands this or I fear he could lock up the rations and force us into eating the cats food. Wow how things have changed.
Four weeks ago I was running my own kingdom, eating, sleeping, shitting and drinking whenever I pleased. Now I cant even take a crap without the King complaining about it. My kingdom is gone, even the cats have lost respect for me. My queen is so enthralled with the new King I could jump up and down buck naked with a bouquet of flowers and a box of Cadbury eggs and still not catch her eye. All I can do now is plot my revenge - it’ll probably take a good 20 years but someday I will have my Queen and my Kingdom back! Mark my words!
Until then you can find me a prisoner in my old kingdom, no hockey to watch, no beer to drink, nothing but a few hundred stinky diapers and the occasional off hand comment. I am confident I will survive this new world and this Virus, but I am worried it will be without my dignity.
